It has been a while since my last post. I told you when I started this blog that I was going to write when God prompted me to write and yesterday He did that very thing. Some of my friends tell me they hear from God daily, sometimes several times a day. Some of them describe their conversations with Him in very graphic terms, actual audible conversations, while others feel a nudge from the holy spirit. My experience yesterday was more like a full body rush, a rush that was tangible, almost alarming. It happened when I was on my way home from a morning workout and I was thinking about my morning conversation with Terrie. God clearly told me I needed to write about it.
Yesterday was Thursday and for me it was a day filled with catch up work but no matter what day it is I always try to start it in a very intentional way. The first thing I do is thank God for another day, then my thoughts turn to Terrie and my family. Terrie and I happen to be in different states right now so instead of getting to spend time with her during breakfast I make it a point to call her. I love to hear her voice in the morning no matter where we are at but yesterday that voice on the other end of the phone was different. It took me a minute to realize why her voice was different yesterday but then it dawned on me, it was Thursday, her hiking day. The smile in her voice told me so.
21 years ago Terrie and a couple of her friends who share her love for hiking decided they would dedicate every Thursday to hiking together. That decision led to the formation of what became, The Kept Womens Hiking Society, an extraordinary group of women. This group of close friends exhibit an uncommon loyalty for each other that is hard to describe. Every Thursday, rain or shine, snow or wind, no matter what the conditions, they find a way to be together. Sometimes it might be two or three of them, other days it is all 16 of them. At least once per year they do a trip together, maybe to a national park or to a resort that offers great hiking opportunities but more importantly a place for them to be together for several days. They have done major hikes, from Crested Butte to Aspen, through fields of spectacular wild flowers and through the stunning rock formations, arches and canyons in Moab, Utah. They have summited several of Colorado’s fourteen-thousand-foot peaks. They have gathered at a winery and blended their own wine, Chateauneuf-du-Kept. They have taken balloon rides, traversed avalanche debris, struggled up trails filled with scree, encountered bears and moose, enjoyed the beauty of high mountain lakes surrounded by rugged cirques, snow shoed, skied, and driven thousands of miles to reach desired hiking locations. They celebrate birthdays together, cheer the births of grandchildren, take care of each other when someone is sick or hurting and they pray for each other. Oh, and once per year they invite the “keepers” to join them for a party. The Kept Women even have their own logo which they proudly display on caps and the shirts they produce every year that list all of their major hikes, just like a rock groups tour shirt.
No matter where I am at, or what I am doing, without looking at my phone, without looking at a calendar, giving no conscious thought to what day it is, I can tell from talking to Terrie it is Thursday. On Thursday, when she is with her hiking friends, Terrie’s voice smiles and it is something all of us men should wish for our wives or girlfriends. For me, hearing Terrie’s voice smile is a wonderful gift, a gift that tells me she is alright, and we are alright. It is a gift you cannot buy with diamonds or trips or flowers. It is a gift that comes from love, from calmness, from freedom, from a joyful heart.
Too many men keep their wife from experiencing “the smile.” The idea of it scares them. As with most things in my journey as a man it took me a while to figure this out but now, I am neither threatened or challenged by the idea that Terrie has this close group of friends and cherishes her time with them. It doesn’t mean that spending time with me cannot make her smile. No, this is something completely different. This is something I need to encourage her in because it nourishes her. The smile I speak of is rooted in joy, it is filled with emotion, it is sustained by understanding.
The smile I am talking about is something you need to listen for and learn to recognize. That is not easy for men. We don’t listen well and we learn what we want to learn. If you are married and have not heard the voice I speak of, start asking yourself why. Take time to read Ephesians 5:25 – 33. Paul gives us a really good analogy for how we should love our wives. If you aren’t married, you are lucky because you have time to practice. Learn what triggers her voice to smile. Pay attention to the sometimes little signs that will signal to you she has found something special, something that ministers to her soul, something that blesses her heart, something that makes her voice smile. Then do everything you can to encourage her to do or experience that something often. I am not suggesting you have a duty or a responsibility to do this. Instead, it should be something men should desire, something we encourage, something that ministers to us as much as to her. So, the next time you pick up the phone to call her, sit across a table from her, listen to her conversation with a friend or hear her say good morning to you, ask yourself, does her voice smile?
Doug's Journey 