A Lesson in Humility and Kindness

I titled this blog, God, Love, Life, Lessons. This entry is about a lesson.

Micha 6:8 (ESV) – He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God.

Some of the synonyms for kindness are, courtesy, indulgence, grace, blessing, and mercy. Merriam Webster defines humility as, “the absence of any feelings of being better than others.”

The lesson I want to share came during a trip we made to Mexico at the invitation of two close friends. I will simply identify them as Brad and Lori. They very graciously invited us to join them for a week at their beautiful time share property in Cabo San Lucas.

First, a little history on our experience traveling in Mexico. Over the span of our marriage we have grown to love Mexico and have visited several different resort cities including Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, Playa del Carmen, Zihautanejo, Punta Mita, and Cabo San Lucas among others. We love the food, the surrounding sea waters, the culture and the people. It all started when for my 30th birthday (yes – that was a long time ago) Terrie took me on a surprise trip to Puerto Vallarta. Prior to that trip I had been to Mexico once when me and my best high school buddy decided to take a trip to Mexico City and Acapulco. Maybe someday I will share some of that trip with you but probably not! I digress. Terrie booked us into a new resort named La Joya de Mismaloya which was a little south of the actual town. When we arrived at the resort we were given a quick tour of the property, quickly unpacked, threw on our swimming suits and headed for the beach. We had been warned by the resort host to avoid the beach vendors who would be working in the area. We were told their goods were cheap – the jewelry was fake, the clothes would fall apart after a couple wearings and they would steal any valuables left unattended. The host also told us that if we did make a purchase from one of the vendors, all of the vendors in the area would run to us like bees to honey and we would be harassed until we left. Sure enough, we had not been on the beach very long when I was approached by one of the vendors. Considering the advice from the hotel host I politely told him, “no, gracias” but being a persistent fellow he again made his appeal to me. He finally moved on when I ignored him. The vendor parade continued, back and forth they walked, a constant flow of men and women, boys and girls, hawking t-shirts, bracelets, dog collars, silver jewelry, hats, wood carvings – it went on and on. I did my best to ignore them but in the end I became annoyed with them and was probably very rude when I chased them away.

The dance of the beach vendors was repeated at every beach town we visited. Sayulita, Nueva Vallarta, Xtapa – it didn’t matter, they were always there. By the time the new millennium rolled around we had been visiting Mexico for almost 30 years and I had become quite adept at dealing with the beach vendors. Then our most recent trip to Cabo San Lucas happened and everything changed.

Back to our friends Brad and Lori. Like us, they have been visiting Mexico for a long time. They use their time share regularly and are extremely generous in using their time share points to invite friends and relatives to join them in Cabo. Their resort is beautiful and the people working there were all so nice. It was setting up to be a fun, relaxing week with great food, lots of pool and beach time, massages and other activities. Brad explained to me that he would get up early every morning to save us some seats right on the rail overlooking the beach. That sounded great to me because if we weren’t on the beach we could avoid the beach vendor dance. Better yet, the area he was talking about was about 10 feet above the beach level so I would be able to look right over all the vendors and completely ignore them.

The first thing I should have paid attention to was the way Brad and Lori treated the hotel staff. They didn’t just return the greeting, “hola, buenos dias, como esta’?” There were hugs and questions about families and “so good to see you, it has been a little while.” It was quite obvious these were not just polite gestures by the staff to make guests comfortable. These were conversations that arose from genuine relationships that had been established over several years. These were conversations that displayed mutual respect and care for one another.

For me, the real wake-up call came the next morning. After a wonderful breakfast we “retired” to our seats adjacent to the railing overlooking the beach. When Brad and Lori arrived at the seats he was wearing a nice Cabo San Lucas t-shirt and she was wearing an attractive swim suit cover-up. To my surprise they told me they had purchased the items from one of beach vendors during a previous trip. In fact, they pointed out the vendor who was positioned on the sand directly below us. She had a stack of ladies cover-ups similar to the one Lori was wearing. Next to her was a man with a large case filled with silver jewelry. I recalled that on a previous trip with Lori, Terrie had purchased a ring from him. It was actually a very nice looking ring and surprise, it didn’t turn her finger black. It didn’t take long before we were down on the beach being introduced to Jesus and his wife, Alejandra. It was almost like a family reunion. Terrie began to examine a pair of silver earrings and Jesus explained how he made them. Wait, he really did make the wares he was displaying? They weren’t cheap fakes like we had been lead to believe. Then there was Alfred, an older man with a bum foot. When he saw Brad he got a big grin on his face and said, “Hola. Remember me? Alfred. You bought t-shirts from me.” Brad fist bumped Alfred and told him to come around the next day and he would buy shirts for his brother and Lori’s nephew. This sort of “reunion” continued as we walked down the beach. Many of the vendors knew Brad and Lori. It was like old home week on the beach.

So what’s the lesson? The lesson became clear as I watched my friends interact with those creative, friendly, hardworking people. Here were two people from an economic stratosphere the beach vendors could only imagine and yet there was a tangible connection between them. The lesson was poured out time and time again, not only from the beach vendors but from the hotel staff. It is a lesson on humility and a lesson on kindness. It is a reminder that God created each of us to be wholly unique and as Merriam Webster observed, to be without feelings we are better than others. It was a lesson that, like so many others I have experienced, created in me feelings of regret and guilt for all the years I brushed those people off. Humility and kindness – why is it so hard for many of us to practice humility and kindness?

My prayer is that God has forever changed my heart through the example Brad and Lori provided. I know I will fail from time to time but I will always have Brad and Lori’s example to fall back on, to wake me up.

Chuck Swindoll said this about what Micah is teaching us in chapter 6 verse 8. “Most of us don’t decide daily to cut people down or find ways to carry out injustice. Instead, we do it out of habit. Let’s allow the words of Micah to break us out of our apathy about extending justice and kindness to others and press on toward a world that better resembles the harmonious millennial kingdom to come. Let’s determine to live as God desires—“to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with our God” That is exactly what our friends Brad and Lori modeled for us. Specifically humility and kindness – that is their habit. It is never too late to make them your habit too!